Common Courtesy

Cologniano

Well-known member
Oct 28, 2012
Hi!
I’m just wondering if anyone gets ghosted in a Sales Thread? You answer as many questions as you can, extra pics, batch numbers or even a history of where the fragrance is stored. Then a price negotiation starts and you know what they’re alluding to. Me personally, my selling price is really low if not the lowest.

They then disappear. Several messages later they’re gone without a no thanks or I’ll pass. Left hanging waiting for a reply. I personally find it rude. Please be considerate of others regardless. It’s a common courtesy to say “no thanks.”
Happy Holidays everyone!

C
 

Mak-7

Well-known member
Sep 19, 2019
I apologize if i left conversation the Irish/French/English way. Not intentional.

As for price - you always have good prices, those are lowballers for the main part.

Finally - what is the etiquette of asking for the lower price or sales negotiation in general? Do we have such a thread?
 

PStoller

I’m not old, I’m vintage.
Basenotes Plus
Aug 1, 2019
…what is the etiquette of asking for the lower price or sales negotiation in general?

I’m sure people have somewhat different notions and styles, but “Would you accept $X?” seems a fair way to ask. If you lowball, you should be prepared to hear, “No.” If you don’t, you should still be prepared for a no or a counter-offer.

If a seller’s prices are substantially higher than what you’re prepared to spend, don’t waste your own time or theirs with requests for pictures or other info when you know you’d only buy at 40% off. If their item has been listed a long time, lead with the bargaining: “I see you’ve had this up at $X for six months; since it apparently isn’t fetching that price, would you consider $Y?” If they’re content to keep waiting, move on.

The more you ask of a seller’s time and effort, the less of a discount you should request, if any at all. It helps if you buy more than one item: I’m more likely to negotiate successfully for deals when buying several items at once. I also pay immediately.

The net result for me has been to develop good relationships with sellers on several different platforms.

In short, don’t be a jerk. Put yourself in the seller’s shoes, and treat them as you’d wish to be treated.
 

Swoleiosis

Well-known member
Jan 10, 2020
Happens all the time. Don't consider something sold until the money is sent. Also, you'll quickly see a pattern in these types. The constant questions, negotiations, then at the last moment, a request for an even lower price or suddenly not wanting a few things while still wanting the multi item discount.. etc... and it's ten times worse on ebay.

Don't hurt yourself by giving ppl like that too much of your time or any emotional investment. 1 word responses, take it or leave it attitude, and being in no rush to ship, will all protect your sanity.
 

Cologniano

Well-known member
Oct 28, 2012
Happens all the time. Don't consider something sold until the money is sent. Also, you'll quickly see a pattern in these types. The constant questions, negotiations, then at the last moment, a request for an even lower price or suddenly not wanting a few things while still wanting the multi item discount.. etc... and it's ten times worse on ebay.

Don't hurt yourself by giving ppl like that too much of your time or any emotional investment. 1 word responses, take it or leave it attitude, and being in no rush to ship, will all protect your sanity.
When it happens with a well known and/or long time member it is annoying, particularly if you pended an item for them.
And send your PayPal email….

Merry Christmas everyone!
 

Andy the frenchy

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2018
Hi!
I’m just wondering if anyone gets ghosted in a Sales Thread? You answer as many questions as you can, extra pics, batch numbers or even a history of where the fragrance is stored. Then a price negotiation starts and you know what they’re alluding to. Me personally, my selling price is really low if not the lowest.

They then disappear. Several messages later they’re gone without a no thanks or I’ll pass. Left hanging waiting for a reply. I personally find it rude. Please be considerate of others regardless. It’s a common courtesy to say “no thanks.”
Happy Holidays everyone!

C
Happened to me already a couple of times, and it's not even 2 months I've started my sales thread. I might consider starting to leave bad reviews for who does that, but also for who keep their sales/swap threads up without updates on their selling status and do not answer. When I see a sales thread that stays up, with the seller telling me 'it's available' but then does not respond anymore despite I can see that they logged in in the meanwhile, that's not ok. Publishing on BN is free and it's a privilege that shouldn't be abused. Might even propose to Grant to ban from the market place the unresponsive sellers/swappers.

The ghosting part is something that unfortunately occurs from both the buyer and the seller's sides, depending of the cases.
 

stuigi

Basenotes Plus
Basenotes Plus
Sep 3, 2004
Over the years this has happened to me any many others. Some list things for sale but do not log onto the site often. Others express interest hoping one will pend the item(s) so they can look further, while never responding again even if reminded. Feedback can't currently be left for uncompleted transactions, and it would be hard to prove without many PM's having to be revealed and looked at by moderators.
 

Andy the frenchy

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2018
Over the years this has happened to me any many others. Some list things for sale but do not log onto the site often. Others express interest hoping one will pend the item(s) so they can look further, while never responding again even if reminded. Feedback can't currently be left for uncompleted transactions, and it would be hard to prove without many PM's having to be revealed and looked at by moderators.
Why not? Even if 'potential', there is still a buyer and a seller.
I have a couple of case, where I have plenty of unresponded PM's despite the guy logged in. Not sure why it is so hard to answer 'no', or simply to put a message on the thread like 'store temporary closed' or so.
Once I had an inquiry for a frag I stated in a post that I was going to sell, without having yet listed it. I kindly answered that I didn't make adecision yet, and that I would reach out when doing so. And when I did decide, I sent the guy a PM.

I have no problem with a buyer inquiring and not following up when seeing the details/prices. I have a problem when someone says 'yes' and then does not follow up.
I have no problem with a seller not answering when asked for a swap (although as a member of the Bn community, it should be just normal to answer a one line to say no), but when a seller says yes it's available, and then I state ok give me your paypal they don;t answer, I have a problem.
But I am monitoring those couple of threads, and if I see that the frags have disappeared or increased price after I inquired, I will definitely report then for bad practice.
Might be ok for an anonymous big machine like ebay, not for a smaller platform that presents itself as a 'community'.
 

Cologniano

Well-known member
Oct 28, 2012
Why not? Even if 'potential', there is still a buyer and a seller.
I have a couple of case, where I have plenty of unresponded PM's despite the guy logged in. Not sure why it is so hard to answer 'no', or simply to put a message on the thread like 'store temporary closed' or so.
Once I had an inquiry for a frag I stated in a post that I was going to sell, without having yet listed it. I kindly answered that I didn't make adecision yet, and that I would reach out when doing so. And when I did decide, I sent the guy a PM.

I have no problem with a buyer inquiring and not following up when seeing the details/prices. I have a problem when someone says 'yes' and then does not follow up.
I have no problem with a seller not answering when asked for a swap (although as a member of the Bn community, it should be just normal to answer a one line to say no), but when a seller says yes it's available, and then I state ok give me your paypal they don;t answer, I have a problem.
But I am monitoring those couple of threads, and if I see that the frags have disappeared or increased price after I inquired, I will definitely report then for bad practice.
Might be ok for an anonymous big machine like ebay, not for a smaller platform that presents itself as a 'community'.
I’ve had instances where conversations are misconstrued as binding agreements. Just recently I had a hot item for sale and was bombarded with about 30 messages from low balling to would I like the fragrance questions. I was so overwhelmed I put together a package deal for a bundle including the popular item just to make it go away. It pissed some people off. I as a seller have a right to choose who I sell to regardless of the conversation. Each person thinks they’re the only conversation . Truth is there is wheeling and dealing behind the scenes when there are multiple prospective buyers. You may say you’re interested, if I don’t respond with okay here is my PayPal address, then there is no agreement.
 

Andy the frenchy

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2018
I’ve had instances where conversations are misconstrued as binding agreements. Just recently I had a hot item for sale and was bombarded with about 30 messages from low balling to would I like the fragrance questions. I was so overwhelmed I put together a package deal for a bundle including the popular item just to make it go away. It pissed some people off. I as a seller have a right to choose who I sell to regardless of the conversation. Each person thinks they’re the only conversation . Truth is there is wheeling and dealing behind the scenes when there are multiple prospective buyers. You may say you’re interested, if I don’t respond with okay here is my PayPal address, then there is no agreement.
I would have responded 'I'm not interested anymore', if the buyer inquires politely, so it saves time for everyboody instead of leaving things hanging.
If he keeps going, (that is: being stalkative), one can respond again NO or simply block. I would have blocked the undesired potential buyer, there's a feature for that.
Again, posting a sales listing on BN is not a right but a privilege that should be a win win for everybody. There should be more accountability from both sides, all what I'm saying.

I politely made a swap offer on one of your sales, you have politely declined my offer, I have not insisted. The way to go.
On the other hand, I have another seller that answered me 'yes it's still available to buy". I asked for the paypal, no response. I ask again 2 weeks later, no response. And the guy logged in multiple time. Again, I have no problem hearing NO, I have a problem hearing anything.
It's not illegal to ghost, just unpleasant and opposite to what a community tries to build. Waiting to see the boss's opinion on that.
 

Minotauro

Well-known member
Jul 12, 2021
My aunt once had a cosmetics and perfume shop and she met - as I suppose with most people who have run a store - rude and irritating people.
If this happens in a "physical" store, I don't want to imagine how some people can behave via the internet.

You know what they say, customers are always right.
 

Andy the frenchy

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2018
Well, I have thought about this issue, and as I am new here I want to establish myself up front.

Do this to me, and I will simply shun you, then shame you without passion or prejudice.
Yes I agree. Ghosters should be put in the spotlight. Maybe not 'shame you without prejudice', as this sounds a bit extreme, but htere should be a way for the community to see a negative 'communication' rating, in order to understand "do not loose time with that guy", or those simply banned from the marketplace subforum. For both buyer and seller sides.
 

Andy the frenchy

Well-known member
Sep 16, 2018
My aunt once had a cosmetics and perfume shop and she met - as I suppose with most people who have run a store - rude and irritating people.
If this happens in a "physical" store, I don't want to imagine how some people can behave via the internet.

You know what they say, customers are always right.
Customer are only right if someone really needs to sell.
Yes plenty of irritating buyers. My father runned a store, I know that. But as an experienced buyer, I also entered many stores several times, and I met rude or irritating sellers. And that behavior also worsened with internet - it's enough to see the many complaints for poor/rude customer service to understand that.

Note: I am both a seller of (currently) 100+ frags, answering inquiries on 2 platforms, and a potential buyer/trader inquiring for sales/swaps.
I am answering each and every inquiry, and me too I am bored when I had a couple of 'yes-and-ghosting' deals, but that's the price to pay to save ebay fees. If I don;t want to do that, I could pay ebay.
I am also surprised to see the number of my requests left unanswered with not even a 'no thank you' (despite here it's supposed to be a 'community') - but that's no big deal. What I'm pissed at is when they answer YES, I say 'take my dollars' and then it remains unanswered. Seriously... what's their problem?

There should be a way to flag that as 'time waster'.
 

Desertdoc

Basenotes Plus
Basenotes Plus
Dec 27, 2021
Yes I agree. Ghosters should be put in the spotlight. Maybe not 'shame you without prejudice', as this sounds a bit extreme, but htere should be a way for the community to see a negative 'communication' rating, in order to understand "do not loose time with that guy", or those simply banned from the marketplace subforum. For both buyer and seller sides.
Without prejudice means I need not be harsh or embellish, their transgression stands alone.
 

nosey74

Well-known member
Aug 30, 2014
Hi!
I’m just wondering if anyone gets ghosted in a Sales Thread? You answer as many questions as you can, extra pics, batch numbers or even a history of where the fragrance is stored. Then a price negotiation starts and you know what they’re alluding to. Me personally, my selling price is really low if not the lowest.

They then disappear. Several messages later they’re gone without a no thanks or I’ll pass. Left hanging waiting for a reply. I personally find it rude. Please be considerate of others regardless. It’s a common courtesy to say “no thanks.”
Happy Holidays everyone!

C
Yes this happens to me too...part of working with people :)

Sometimes I'll follow up and say something like "Hi. I haven't heard from you in a few days - are there any other questions I can answer for you? "
 

stuigi

Basenotes Plus
Basenotes Plus
Sep 3, 2004
In theory it would be good to expose such people if they do not respond, but it would increase the burden of moderators to have to investigate deals gone bad and lacks of responses. I would think 95%+ of all agreed to deals are completed or offers declined. Those few that are being discussed here are indeed very annoying, but a failure to respond is hard to prove.
 

RedRaider430

You smell good! 😄
Basenotes Plus
Dec 18, 2011
I as a seller have a right to choose who I sell to regardless of the conversation.
I believe it's true that a seller has the right to sell to whomever they want. However, when it comes to having multiple people interested, all at the same time, it has always been my belief when selling in the Market Place that there's kind of a gentleman's agreement that whoever asked to buy the fragrance first should be given the opportunity to do just that. I'm not talking about people trying to lowball or haggling over price. They don't count, IMO, because they haven't really shown themselves to be a serious buyer.

The buyer who the seller first agrees to sell to, and/or who the seller gives their PayPal address for payment, should get the first crack at buying it. This is how I have always done my sales, and I think most people on Basenotes do it this way. This situation really hasn't come up much for me, but it has on occasion.
 
Last edited:

PStoller

I’m not old, I’m vintage.
Basenotes Plus
Aug 1, 2019
…it has always been my belief when selling in the Market Place that there's kind of a gentleman's agreement that whoever asked to buy the fragrance first should be given the opportunity to do just that.

As a buyer, I enter any discussion with the same understanding. If a seller tells me they have an offer already, I bow out, asking only that they tell me if all prior offers fall through.
 

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